There are times when i catch myself trying to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. The balancing act of touring road musician, father, and a husband becomes a bit arduous. Struggling to keep everybody happy, i quickly lose sight of my own happiness.
i want to fix everybody and everything, yet i lay in a pile of a thousand jagged pieces. i beat myself up for falling short of my desires and before long everything seems all screwed up.
i constantly have to remind myself to “Stay out of my way!!”
i can screw myself up! i can convince myself that i’m a failure, that i’m weak, no good, fat, ugly, you name it, if i give them enough time and attention those negative thoughts soon become me. And that is not me, and that is not how God wants me to be. Okay Dr. Seuss.
So you know what i do? i thought you’d never ask. Now, it’s not easy, and it does take work but with some time and conscious effort you’ll see what i’m talking about.
i try to push those negative thoughts out of my mind with good thoughts. The moment they start to creep into your my head i shove them out with thinking about all the positive things in my life, or by repeating a simple positive phrase over and over until my negative thoughts disappear. Sometimes it takes awhile but i have found that if i can turn my focus to the positive instead of the negative things begin to change.
My pastor, the late David Foster, used to always say, “we are messy, screwed up people and hurt people hurt people.” That’s the truth, we are messy and when we are at our lowest and most hurt is when we say or do things that hurt the ones that love us the most. Don’t get in your way, don’t let yourself fill your head with negativity. You are a snowflake, a fingerprint, created in the image of God, there is no one like you on this entire planet. You are special, a ray of golden light shining through the clouds. Believe in yourself and stop trying to fix everything. Remember, to be a fixer of things you must first be fixed.